10/22/2012

What If I'm Doing Something Wrong?

Becoming a mum for the first time is a very scary experience and I'll admit in the weeks leading up to Thomas's arrival I was pretty terrified. Sure I've had a bit of experience with babies I've got a younger sister and brother and younger cousin's but I've never had to look after a tiny baby for any length of time before. So I had moments of panic thinking what if I don't know what to do if he cries or what if he gets poorly what do I do then. What about if I'm getting him dressed and accidentally brake him?

The reality is when your baby comes along something clicks in your head and you know what to do, you start recognising the different cries (Or in Thomas's case the screams) You know when he is tired rather than hungry and you know when he is just getting bored and wants to be picked up and fussed for a while. There are of course times when Thomas's cries for no apparent reason but all you need to do is keep calm and work through a list of possibilities in your head of what could be wrong. Babies can pick up when you are tense so always keep calm. Also when they are really young you wont accidentally pull a limb off when you are getting them dressed, babies are quite sturdy really just look at how the midwifes pull them about when you are giving birth.

In the early days we use to put Thomas is to his swing chair to go to sleep people would have told us that was wrong and it would be a bad habit to get in to but he was soon out of that habit and he hasn't used that chair to fall asleep in for weeks.

Worrying that you are doing wrong doesn't end there either, No I worried when we couldn't get on with breast feeding I felt like I was failing as a mum but David was very supportive and I know now that breast feeding wasn't for us, we give it a go at least but it didn't work for us. Thomas is doing great on his bottles and that's good enough for me. I was also worried in case I was doing the wrong this with weaning him at 4 months but I knew milk wasn't doing anything for him with the amount he was guzzling before bedtime, so I began to give him some puree with his bed time feed and he loves it. If he wasn't interested I wouldn't of tried I would have left it for a month or so and then tried again. But Thomas is loving all of the new tastes and he is a lot more settled these days so that just shows he was ready.

At the minute Thomas wakes around 6am and I bring him in to our bed where he will go sleep for another hour or 2. Some people will tell me that I shouldn't be doing that as it's a bad habit to get in to. For now though I like it especially as he's in his own room, it's my time to have a cuddle and I love falling to sleep listening to him breathe. I don't mind much about him being in the habit of waking up at 6am either as when I go back to work that's what time we will have to get up anyway.

I think as parents we will always worry in case we are doing something wrong, I know I will. I will worry about sending him to the right nursery the right schools but I guess what I'm trying to say is nobody knows your baby like you do. You know what is best

4 comments:

  1. I have 3 pregnant sisters at the moment! + 2 nieces and 3 nephews already so I'm pretty much surrounded by children! Couldn't imagine not being able to give them back to their mum when they're crying though :) lovely blog. xoxo

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  2. I'm nowhere near having kids yet but it's great to see someone who is writing about parenting in a real sense. I have a few friends who worry so much about not breastfeeding or having their kids sleep with them sometimes - it seems they're more worried about being judged than what's best for their kids! Very refreshing post :)

    http://theteapotblog.blogspot.co.uk

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  3. I couldn't agree more. Instinctive parenting is the most effective way to raise a child, in my opinion because you are doing what comes naturally. Being led by the baby and your instincts... it does come naturally to most women. You just need the confidence to believe in yourself. I love this post! :)

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  4. Love this post! As a new mummy myself I can relate to every single point in this post and have done all the same things as you apart from the weaning! This is my current dilemma but you have reminded me that as a mummy you usually know best! Society is the cause of our worries when we aren't doing things by the book but my boy is happy and healthy and that is all that matters at the moment! Thank you for reminding me of all this and showing me I'm not the only one! :)

    Franki
    Littlelucaandme.blogspot.com

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